


Subject:  Formal Complaint

by CommunionNimrod



Category: Pacific Rim (Movies)
Genre: Eventual Relationships, Grumpy Hermann Gottlieb, Newt is annoying, POV Hermann Gottlieb, and Hermann has no patience, neither does the Marshal, they're both dumb
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-24
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-07-16 14:52:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 6,871
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16088360
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CommunionNimrod/pseuds/CommunionNimrod
Summary: Pan Pacific Defense Corps Personnel Dossier: Hermann GottliebNotes: Inveterate filer of complaints, primarily against Kaiju Science colleague Dr. Newton Geiszler.  PPDC psychological staff recommends accepting but not acting on these complaints.





	1. Complaint #1:  Request for Transfer

**Author's Note:**

> When I saw Hermann's dossier from the novelization on the PacRim wikia and saw the notes at the end that I used in the fic summary, it just ... cracked me up. Of course it's really no secret that Hermann would have complained over and over again about his dear colleague for one crazy reason or another, but I was compelled to have a bit of fun with it!
> 
> Story tags will update as new complaints are added.

After three years, Hermann had been eager to meet Doctor Geiszler face to face.  The letters they had sent back and forth over the years had been wonderful and engaging, the two of them exchanging thoughts and theories concerning the emergence of the kaiju, and how their respective intellectual fields gave them various insights they both agreed others were not having when it came to the problem at hand.  It had been an absolute joy, and had been part of what finally caused him to join up with the Pan Pacific Defense Corps Jaeger Academy.

So in 2017, when everything aligned and allowed for the two scientists to finally meet in person, Hermann had been ecstatic.  The two of them were being assigned to the Kaiju-Science (commonly dubbed K-Science among personnel) division, aligning their efforts to start further examining the alien creatures to figure out what made them tick and how to get ahead and defeat them permanently.

Their first meeting … hadn’t gone as expected.  Doctor Geiszler was quite a casual individual. He was honestly _too_ casual.  It rubbed Hermann the wrong way almost instantly, but he tried staying objective, as they were about to become actual colleagues.  The air between them seemed a bit stiff, but their conversation hadn’t been a total loss. The doctor’s mind was impressive, worthy of all the respect Hermann had, even if his transitions were a bit quick and difficult to follow at times.

It had been okay, overall.  He supposed. Even if Doctor Geiszler did interrupt him a few times to make some off-color joke or comment on his attire that made Hermann bristle.  It was also, unfortunately, the first and only civil conversation they ended up having.

A month into their working relationship and Hermann had never harbored more intense irritation for a single person than he did Doctor Geiszler.  The man made him so mad he would stumble over his words as they shouted at each other across the lab, causing their fellow lab partners to sigh and bury their head in their current work in efforts to ignore them as much as possible.  Geiszler would call him a number-obsessed freak, Hermann would scoff at his excitement towards these horrible creatures that were destroying their world. The smallest of rude or insulting comments from one of them would turn the air hostile in seconds.  Everything was unraveling chaotically, and Hermann had found himself already reaching a breaking point.

“It would not _kill_ you to be organized for once,” he was snapping, walking furiously over to his work station after having tripped over a stack of folders the fellow scientist had just left sitting on the floor, causing pain to flare up in his weaker leg.  

“Oh yeah, so I can be an uptight neat freak like you, that sounds grrrrrreat,” Geiszler snapped back, obnoxiously rolling his r in a clearly mocking tone.  

Hermann growled and sat down in his chair forcefully, deciding to take the high ground that the other man had likely never seen in his life, and not responding.  He pulled his computer out of sleep mode.

“And now he ignores me,” Geiszler yelled dramatically to no one in particular. “Mr High and Mighty Doctor Gottlieb cannot bear to speak to a plebeian such as myself anymore, good show everyone, why don’t we all stick out noses up so high in the air so that maybe he’ll see our fabulous brains and decide we are worth speaking to again!”

Hermann sneered at his monitor, typing furiously.

 

**Marshal’s Office  
** **P.P.D.C.  
** **Subject: Request for Transfer**

**Dear Marshal,**

**I am writing this morning to inform of an obstacle within the Kaiju Science division that I feel needs to be addressed in a timely manner in order to ensure work continues smoothly.  Doctor Geiszler and I seem to have come to the point where I believe working together is not beneficial to the Defense Corps, and I grow concerned will only take away from our ability to effectively study the kaiju and improve the Jaegers effectively.**

**Over the past month that this team was put together, the situation has devolved into something unfortunately unprofessional.  While I respect the work Doctor Geiszler is doing for the P.P.D.C., I feel that our differences are too great to inhabit the same space on a daily basis.**

**I would like to request the consideration that one of the two of us be transferred to another base.  This way we can continue in our scientific efforts appropriately, unclouded by the complications that have risen between us.  I feel like we can continue to effectively work together over written correspondence, as we proved to do over the past few years quite well, and believe the distance would be better for all parties involved.**

**Thank you for the consideration.**

**Sincerely,**

**Doctor Hermann Gottlieb  
** **PhD**

 

His monitor pinged later that afternoon, causing Hermann to head back over from his chalkboard and lean over, peering at the new message.

 

**Subject: RE: Request for Transfer**

**Dear Doctor Gottlieb,**

**Request denied at this time.  Please continue in your current efforts.**

 

Frustrated, Hermann smacked the surface of his work space, causing everyone in the lab to look at him except Doctor Geiszler.  The man did snort and shake his head, though, which only made Hermann more furious. Such arrogance.

_Damnit._


	2. Complaint #2: Noise

Hermann was in a horrible mood that morning as he finally made his way into the lab.  He’d meant to be getting to work over an hour ago, but a poorly timed video call with his father as he had been getting out of the shower delayed him.

The call went about as expected.  He had always been at odds with his father, but recently it had gotten worse.  Up until now the two of them had been aligned in their contributions and efforts in the Jaeger program - his father had been one of the people involved in its early development, after all, and he had been one of the main reasons Hermann was brought in as a lead in coding the Mark 1 Jaegers.  Recently, however, his father had begun to distance himself from the program.

“You cannot seriously believe an idea like that would hold any merit,” he had snapped as he was buttoning up his shirt, his tablet propped up nearby.  He specifically spoke in English to get under his father’s skin.

“Hermann, mein gott, it is not even a solid enough concept to bring to the UN,” Lars shot back, switching to English as well with a grimace.  It was almost enough to make Hermann smirk. “It is a fledgling idea, but one I believe we should consider.”

“Yes, because a massive, stationary WALL is so much more effective than Jaegers, the things that can actually maneuver and fight, of course, how could I not think of something like that, let us ditch all of my continual coding efforts.  Would you like me to somehow get into construction as well? Is that where this is going?”

“Hermann -”

“I am late for work, _Vater_ , work that I still believe is important, and I will thank you to remember the work _you_ have put into it as well and stop encouraging such foolishness,” Hermann interrupted, ending the call without giving a proper goodbye.  Like most things, his father had been told about something different, and had apparently grown bored with their current efforts and decided to switch gears.  But that would never get off the ground, surely. He had to believe that his father would not be so foolish.

So yes, he was in a horrible mood.  One that only grew as he approached the lab and heard muffled music on the other side.   _Wonderful_.  He sighed, badging in and entering, trying not to twitch as he was hit with the wall of music.

“I just wanna hold you cloooose, I feel your heart so close to miiiiiiiiine, and just stay here in those moment, for all the rest of tiiiiime,” Newton was singing along to the song loudly, a small flashlight strapped to his head, some kind of kaiju specimen in his gloved hands.  Their newest lab tech was nearby, scribbling notes on a clipboard, smiling as she seemed to be singing along as well, although a lot quieter. “Yeah, yeah, YEEEEEAAAHHHH - Oh hey Herms, nice of you to finally join us.”

Hermann cringed as Newton hollered loudly, not due to the singing itself, because the man actually had a surprisingly good singing voice, but just due to the irritation it brought him.  He shot a look over at Newton, glaring at his smug grin over Hermann being late, and gripped his cane tighter as he headed over to his work station without responding.

“I don’t wanna close my eyyyyyes,” Newton continued singing without a beat, clearly not bothered by Hermann choosing not to engage. “I don’t wanna faaaall asleep, cause I’d miss you baby, and I don’t wanna miss a thing.”

Hermann sighed, approaching his chalkboards and gazing at the equations he had written on them.  Clawhook had emerged and attacked San Diego over in the United States just over a month ago. Hermann was starting to see patterns in the data, the numbers telling him more than it was telling anyone else apparently.  He believed that these attacks might not be random. He had thought so for a while, but as the frequency increased, he began thinking about how he could map this data and use it to their advantage moving forward. A predictive model, one could say.  That kind of data could prove to be incredibly useful in ensuring they were better prepared for the next attack.

He spent the better part of the morning mapping out the attacks, trying to block out everything around him.  This, unfortunately, proved to be very difficult when one of your lab partners blared music obnoxiously at decibel levels that should not be comfortable for the human ear.

“I’m **HOT** , sticky sweet!  From my head to my feet, YEAH,” Newton’s voice rang out again a bit later, breaking through the sound wall Hermann had mentally built himself, causing him to falter on what he was rapidly writing and send his chalk line screeching downward haphazardly.  He looked over his shoulder to shoot a glare at the man, who was naturally oblivious, feet propped up on his desk with a sandwich in one hand as he typed away with his other.

“Ugh,” Hermann  muttered under his breath, taking a deep breath and grabbing an eraser to fix his number, and tried continuing to tune him out.

Tried and failed.

“POUR SOME SUGAR ON ME, ooh, in the name of loooooove,” Newton scream-singed. “Pour some sugar on me, c’mon, FIRE ME UUUUUP.”

“WOULD YOU CEASE THAT RACKET?!” Hermann finally screamed, slamming his chalk down on the holder of his board and spinning entirely to face into the lab.  The music kept blaring but Newton had stopped singing, rolling his chair around, surprise and mild offense on his face.

“What the hell dude?” he asked, throwing his hands up. “What’s your problem?”

“My PROBLEM is that you have not stopped playing this horrific, loud music all morning and some of us are **TRYING** to get proper work done, which we are unable to do because you won’t _shut up_ ,” he seethed, hand balled up in a tight fist.  “This is not a personal space, you could at least be somewhat considerate of that, I swear to god.”

“Um, Herms, you’re literally the only person that seems to be bothered by this,” Newton shot back, dropping his sandwich down on the table and crossing his arms.  “I’m always lab DJ, it was voted. Stop being such an old man about it.”

“It was NOT voted for, you are being an imbecile,” Hermann said, anger rising over the ridiculous nickname Newton had started using even though he had asked multiple times that he not.  He had no professional respect and it was constantly infuriating. Working together for two years now still did not give him the right to call him by anything than his full given name.

Newton glared at Hermann, who glared back just as harsh, waiting for him to explode back in whatever childish name-calling he would steep to.  Instead, though, Newton leaned over and shut the song off. The lab went dead silent. Hermann could have breathed out a sigh of relief, amazed that Newton actually did what he’d asked.

Hermann should have known it wasn’t actually that easy though.  Newton’s hand moved across the device he had plugged into the speakers without breaking eye contact, and after a moment, another song started.  Hermann’s eyes slanted suspiciously.  He hadn't heard this one before ...  He found himself paying attention to the lyrics for reasons he couldn’t quite say.  But Newton was still staring at him, not moving, not singing. Perhaps that **was** why, actually.

Hermann opened his mouth to say something, growing even more furious.  Newton shot a hand up, palm out, as if he was requesting him to wait.  Hermann grunted in annoyance, frowning even deeper.  Newton kept staring at him, his face almost impassive, and it was so unnerving that he'd honestly stopped paying attention to whatever song this was.  After a moment, though, Newt reached over and turned the volume up **_higher_ ** as what Hermann believed to be the chorus kicked in.

 _Fuck you (fuck you)  
_ _Fuck you very, very much  
_ _‘Cause we hate what you do  
_ _And we hate your whole crew  
_ _So please don’t stay in touch_

“Oh honestly, Newton, this is so childish,” he screamed, smacking a nearby chair with his cane in anger.  The man just ignored him, starting to sing along and even flipping Hermann the bird as he did so.

Hermann growled out loud, storming over to his console and pulling up his email so he could compose a new message.

 

 **Marshal’s Office  
** **P.P.D.C.  
** **Subject:  Formal Complaint**

 

**Dear Marshal,**

**I am writing this afternoon to log a severe formal complaint against my colleague Doctor Newton Geiszler.  He continues to play music very loudly inside of the lab, with no consideration to the rest of us trying to work and get things done.  He responds to requests of turning the music down by only playing it louder, and even getting crude in his musical choices.**

**He has no respect for the individuals working next to him in K-Science and I would like to strongly request that the musical equipment he has set up within the lab be confiscated so that moving forward, we can work under normal auditory conditions.**

**Sincerely,**

**Doctor Hermann Gottlieb  
** **PhD**


	3. Complaint #3: Chalk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> committed to updating on Mondays and then promptly missed the very next Monday, sorry about that!

Newton was in rare form today.  Hermann had tried ignoring him most of the morning, because really, it was the best thing he could do when the other scientist was on a rampage like this.  Usually if he let Newton stomp and rant himself tired, there was at least some peace later in the day. However, neither of them had gotten much sleep, they were both hitting walls in their research, with the higher ups checking in on them more often than normal.  

They did _not_ need babysitters.  So really, Newton was not the other one that had pent up frustration.  Perhaps that was why Hermann broke his long-standing rule of ignoring an angry Newton Geiszler.

“Will you just calm down and take a breath or something?” he asked tiredly, taking his glasses off and pinching the bridge of his nose with a chalk-covered hand.

“Just … Just **_calm down_ **?!” Newton stammered, freezing mid-pace and spinning to glare at him.  “You can’t. You cannot be serious right now.”

“Do not turn your aggression on me, Newton,” Hermann snapped, glaring back.

“You can’t expect me to calm down when the bastards that go out on these damn cleanup crews don’t LISTEN to me!” Newton shouted, throwing his hands up in the air.  “I have told them time and time again how best to cut up and transport the kaiju samples, and they keep sending back crap. I can’t work with this! They’re all so stupid!!”

On that they could agree.  Hermann was constantly baffled by the idiocy of the people around them.  Admittedly, he understood why Newton was so frustrated. A lot of his samples were not being stored and transported properly, leaving the biologist little new information to glean from what was brought back.  The Marshal also would not grant him access to leaving the Shatterdome and going with the crew to extract samples himself. Hermann agreed with that decision though. Letting Newton go to ground zero of the attacks was risky.  His lab partner was too important to expose him to those areas (not that Hermann would ever say this aloud).

“And the Marshal is just _ignoring_ me now when I try to bring up letting me go with them,” Newton continued to rant, picking up one of his flashlight head straps and slamming it back down on the table.  Hermann rolled his eyes.

“Because it is a foolish request,” he sighed, starting to make his way across the lab.  He needed something to drink. Perhaps if he made some coffee and shoved a mug into Newton’s hands it would shut him up for five minutes.

“ **It is not** !” Newton screeched.  “Goddamnit Hermann, I can’t get any WORK done like this!  It’s not like the kaiju are **alive** when these crews get there, Christ, it would make so much more sense for me to be allowed to GO.”

“Maybe so but it’s not going to happen so you need to find another way to adapt,” Hermann shouted, slamming the coffee pot down on the burner and checking to make sure it had the appropriate water levels.  He turned the coffee pot on with a harsh jab of his finger. “Ranting and raving about it is not going to change things, you are not going out there, so just deal with it.”

“Good god Hermann you are such a _bitch_ ,” Newton snarled.  Hermann could hear him stomping.  “You know what? I bet you can’t even imagine how much it sucks not being able to work effectively when the tools you utilize aren’t in a proper condition, huh?  You and your stupid fucking numbers and models and shit.”

Newton’s voice was getting a little farther away, indicating he was moving across the lab as well.  Hermann folding his arms over his chest and glared daggers at the coffee pot, listening to it gurgle as it began to heat up.

“Yeah, it sucks having mutilated materials, dude,” Newton continued to ramble.  Hermann was trying to ignore him again. “Maybe if you get that, you won’t be on my ass like this, it’s bullshit.  Every now and again you need some fucking perspective.”

Hermann rolled his eyes, and after a moment of his colleague going suspiciously quiet, he began to hear other small noises in the lab.  Something snapping. A boot stomping. What in the world … With a scoff, Hermann moved away from the coffee pot and took a few steps back into the main area of the lab, eyes scanning the room.  He found Newton over on **his** side, and narrowed his eyes.

“What in the world are you doing?” he asked.

“Giving you an idea of the shit I keep having to deal with,” Newton growled.

That could not be good.  Hermann balled his hands up into fists and stormed across the lab, only to see Newt standing at his chalkboard.  He furrowed his brow, and then he saw-

“ _NEWTON_!” he screamed, watching as Newton snapped a piece of his chalk in half, dropped one half to the ground, and stomped on it with his foot, grinding it down.  The other piece got tossed back onto the tray. The force of the throw caused it to bounce and fall to the floor, another piece of it breaking off on impact.  At closer inspection, Hermann saw that he had done this with every single piece of chalk he had.

Hermann seethed, storming even closer, but Newton was quicker, ducking out of the way of his hand.  He spun on his heels and started walking backwards away from the area, giving Hermann the middle finger.

“Like that?” he asked. “Sucks, doesn't it?”

“You are a **child** ,” Hermann snapped.

“Fuck you, man,” Newton returned, before spinning and storming out of the lab entirely.

Hermann stood there in silence for a moment, anger making him shake.  He turned and looked over at his chalkboard. While it seemed as though Newton only crushed two or on the floor, he had definitely taken every piece of chalk Hermann currently had and snapped them into two or three smaller pieces.  Some of them were on the tray, some scattered around on the floor.

He understood why Newton was so frustrated at his circumstances, but being angry was not going to change anything.  The Marshal had given him orders, but as usual, Newton did not want to heed or respect those orders. His insolence was infuriating.  His childish behavior was even more so. Perhaps Hermann shouldn’t have goaded him like that, he really should have stuck to annoying him, but that did not change the fact that breaking all of his chalk was unnecessary.

Aggravated, Hermann made his way over to his computer, brushing his hands clean on his pants after sitting down.  

 **Marshal’s Office  
** **P.P.D.C  
** **Subject:  Formal Complaint**

**Dear Marshal,**

**I am writing to log yet another complaint against Doctor Newton Geiszler.  The man continues to act like a child, letting any frustration get the better of him and turn it into an unnecessary meltdown.  He has no regard for protocol, and refuses to acknowledge outside opinions on any matter when he is in one of his** **_moods_ ** **.  Any attempt at communication only increases his ridiculous, hot-headed behavior.  He is crass and destructive, taking to storming out in a temper tantrum if things are not going his way.  It does not provide a constructive environment and it is utterly exhausting. I request that this complaint be forwarded to the psychological staff for their consideration to conduct some anger management counselling.**

**On a clearly related note, please also see the attached supply requisition.  All of my chalk has been rendered almost unusable.**

 

**Sincerely,**

**Doctor Hermann Gottlieb  
** **PhD**


	4. Complaint #4: Kaiju Guts

Hermann started the morning feeling surprisingly optimistic.  His predictive model was getting more and more refined every day, there was lots of work to be done, and jaegers were being brought in to have some upgrades done, of which he was asked to play a part in due to his expertise with the program from early on.  He’d gone into the lab to get a bit of work done, examining his equations and making some adjustments, beginning the next round of calculations, and then he planned on heading down to the hanger to meet with J-Tech and get started.

Newton was in a good mood as well, having received new kaiju samples earlier in the week and having a lot of new tissue to dissect and examine.  He was already elbow-deep in what he had identified yesterday as a spleen, entrails scattered about on his exam table and hanging off, a bit of the beast’s blue blood dripping onto the floor.  If Hermann hadn’t been in such a good mood he would have curled his mouth in disgust at the mess. But so long as he kept it over there, they would be fine.

“Man Hermann,” Newton was rambling, something he was half paying attention to.  “I’ve got some theories about these dudes, nothing I’m ready to show to the hire ups yet, but like.  Listen. As different as all the kaiju look and as varied as all the bits and pieces that get brought to me are, at more of a molecular level …”

“What?” Hermann finally prompted, after his colleague’s train of thought had faded off, glancing to see Newt with his face mere inches away from the spleen.  Were he to get any closer he’d certainly get blood on his nose.  _ Ugh, gross. _

“I-I dunno, they just,” Newton continued, pulling a gloved hand free to wave in a small circle, as if he was mimicking the gears in his mind turning.  “They’re familiar. Like I said, a working theory. Gotta check some stuff out.”

Hermann’s eyes slanted a bit, curious where this train of thought of his was going.  They were similar? He was going out on a limb here, but surely Newton was not suggesting they were all related, or even more ridiculous, clones or something.  Absurd. There was no way.

“Interesting,” he said instead, turning back to his chalkboard again.

They worked in comfortable silence for another hour.  Hermann thoroughly enjoyed days like this. It reminded him how well the two of them truly worked together, occasionally speaking up on whatever they were working on to work through something or bounce ideas off the other.  Days like this made the insufferable days worth it. Hermann had to think that this was why he hadn’t been pushed to a breaking point and quit by now.

This, plus the whole saving the world thing.

After a bit more time had passed, Hermann set his chalk down with a satisfied sigh and turned.  He had about half an hour before he needed to head to J-tech, enough time to either get some base programming logged or grab a bite to eat in their small attached kitchen.

“Hey Herms,” Newton said, drawing Hermann away from his train of thought.  He glanced over at the other scientist, about to protest yet again the use of that ridiculous nickname, but his eyes narrowed as he saw the man holding up a bundle of kaiju entrails in one hand, grinning at him.

“Whatever you are wanting to do, you better decide differently,” Hermann threatened, eyeing him suspiciously.

“Ah c’mon, you gotta get down and dirty every once in a while,” Newt teased, wiggling his hand.  Some blood sprayed onto the side of the apron he was surprisingly wearing. “Here, catch.”

Newt made a motion like he was going to throw the entrails, and Hermann threw a hand out to point angrily in warning, opening his mouth to snap furiously.  He did not appreciate even the joke of the act. However, the entrails were slick, even more so because they were covered in blood, and what was meant to be an act (he  **hoped** ) unfortunately became reality.  

“Ohshitfuck-” Newton’s voice rang out, cutting through the room as Hermann saw the entrails being flung.  

Everything happened too quickly for him to react and move out of the way.  Within the span of two heartbeats, Hermann was being smacked square in the chest by kaiju bits, which thudded against him and then fell to the floor with a dull squish.  He was frozen, staring gobsmacked down at the splatter of blue across his sweater - one of his  _ favorite _ sweaters, Karla had given him this for his birthday two years ago - shock and fury hitting him instantly.

Newton, however, was not frozen.  He jumped into action immediately, scrambling across the lab towards him, tugging off his gloves and apron so that he was mostly clean.  He skidded to a stop next to Hermann, immediately reaching out and grabbing the bottom of the sweater and tugging. Hermann tried to push him away, sputtering out noises of complaint, though no action words were formed.

“Stop, we gotta get this off you, we need to-” Newton was saying, eyes wide with something that Hermann barely registered.  He snarled and shoved against Newton’s chest, pushing him away hard, his sweater bunched up under his arms, revealing his white button-up he wore underneath.

“ **_Get off me_ ** ,” he warned angrily, his voice low and surprisingly steady.

“But Hermann, you need to-”

“I need to do  **nothing** ,” Hermann interrupted, finishing the act of pulling the sweater off and taking a step back, moving away from the entrails like they were poison.  He bunched the clothing up and threw it violently to the floor, before taking stock of the rest of his body. There did not seem to be blood anywhere else on his person, not even his shoes somehow.  Thankfully, this did not mean he would have to strip down or decontaminate himself. Small mercies.

After he was done cataloging himself, Hermann looked up at Newton, who was standing completely still, eyes wide.  To think, they had been having such a nice morning.

“Hermann, I’m-”

“YOU,” he interrupted again, not wanting to hear a single thing Newton had to say right now.  “Need to stop talking, if you know what’s good for you.”

Newton’s mouth snapped shut, eyes still wide.  If Hermann wasn’t so furious, he might have paused to appreciate how quickly the other man was across the lab and to his aid.  But considering that the aid was because of something HE had done, Hermann had no time for admiration or thanks.

“You are an adult and a scientist, you need to start ACTING like one,” he snarled, kicking at his ruined sweater.  “These are not playthings, these are dangerous, disgusting samples of an alien race hell bent on our destruction. I do not understand why you are incapable of acting like an adult, or why you thought that  _ pretending _ to throw something like that was at all a good or funny idea.  You need to take things seriously for once, for GOD’S SAKE. For having six PhDs you so  _ love _ to gloat about, you are SUCH an idiot,  **_Doctor Geiszler_ ** .”

Newton’s hands clenched into fists, a sign that the other man had the urge to scream back.  Hermann internally dared him to. He would love to see the fight Newton tried to put up when they both knew he was right.  Apparently Newton was thinking the same, though, as he just sighed and glanced down at the now ruined sweater on the floor.

Hermann was so angry he just wanted to leave the lab entirely.  However, first he turned and headed over to his computer. He had nothing else to say to Newton, nothing at all, and after a moment he heard footsteps moving back and forth across the lab as Newton picked the entrails back up and continued his own work.

Hermann was so furious he could hardly think straight, even though instinct pulled him through the motions of typing up his newest email.  He had not received a response since the first ever complaint he submitted, but he did not care. It was a matter of principle at this point, and it gave him ground to stand on when the day arrived that he was finally pushed so far that he was charging into the Marshal's office himself.

 

**Marshal's Office  
** **P.P.D.C  
** **Subject: Formal Complaint**

**Dear Marshal,**

**Newton has crossed the line concerning the grievances I have continuously had during our working time together.  The man continues to act so ridiculous and immature that today he decided it would be a grand idea to “pretend” to throw kaiju specimens at me.  That went about as well as you can imagine. Not only has it ruined an article of my clothing, but it could have been much worse had the specimen been larger or messier, resulting in the need for decontamination.**

**This is unprofessional and unacceptable.  How he can sit and demand to be given bits of kaiju in the best condition our retrieval teams are able to procure, and then throw them around and treat them like playthings, is unacceptable.  The potential risks he exposes us both to by his actions should not be shrugged aside. I strongly advocate that this complaint be taken seriously, and that action of some kind is taken to correct this absurdity.**

**Sincerely,**

**Doctor Hermann Gottlieb  
** **PhD**


	5. Complaint #5: Personal Space

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for missing last week! My writing mojo was failing me and life got crazy. I realized by Wednesday what day it was, LOL, and figured by that point, better to wait and stick to the regular schedule and just miss a week. So here we are, updating silliness!

Hermann didn’t ask for much.  He was a simple man and he had simple requests.  Every now and then, he just … wanted some peace and quiet.  Every now and then he would like to be able to sit down on the couch Newton had once mysteriously acquired for their lab, sink into the surprisingly comfortable cushions, and enjoy a cup of tea in peace.  It should not be such a difficult thing to achieve.

He was overworked, overwhelmed, and irritated.  Marshal Pentecost was on him daily about his Breach predictions, K-Science had just undergone yet another budget cut, and things were certainly strained.  The idea of the Anti-Kaiju Wall was gaining more and more traction, which left the PPDC Jaeger program in the dust, it seemed. Not only did their program and efforts suffer for it, Hermann had the constant personal tie to the damned thing too.  That only made topic of the Wall even more of a sore spot for him.

So yes, all Hermann wanted was to sit with his fresh hot cup of tea, close his eyes, and decompress.  Unfortunately, that was difficult to do with Newton as a lab partner. For the most part, Hermann had learned to tune out his inane habits; they had been colleagues for almost four years at this point, and while they still drove each other up the wall, there was a lot more about Newton that he had come to tolerate with more grace and patience than he once had.

At first, Hermann was grateful.  Newton was keeping his music at a much quieter volume than normal, meaning that at times he couldn’t even tell what was playing.  It was wonderful. The peace was short-lived, however. Apparently Hermann’s tea break gave Newton permission to take a break of his own, and if the man wasn’t being dramatically loud on purpose, then someone really needed to have a talk with him about proper chewing etiquette.

“Newton, please,” Hermann finally muttered after a few minutes, gripping his mug of tea securely as he tried to sink comfortably into the couch.  He closed his eyes and sighed.

“What?” his colleague asked, momentarily pausing in his snacking and bringing about a few moments of blessed silence.  It was all Hermann wanted, that wasn’t too much to ask, right?

He didn’t respond, and that seemed to give Newton a few moments pause.  Hermann sipped his tea. Maybe if he didn’t actually answer him, the loud crunching would stop.  It would not be so easy, though. Hermann knew better. Sure enough, after another few seconds, the crunching began again.  Hermann frowned and let his head roll back, thumping against the back of the couch.

“ _ Newton _ ,” he huffed again.  There was a thump, and Hermann assumed it was Newton letting his hand hit the table.

“ **What** , dude?” he repeated, sounding a bit annoyed himself.  Hermann straightened and looked over his shoulder, glaring at the other man across the lab.

“You are a grown man, Newton, please tell me your father actually taught you how to chew with your mouth closed?” he asked, arching an eyebrow pointedly.  Newton gave him a look that was obvious exasperation.

“What the fuck, man,” Newton sighed, glancing down at his bag of chips.  “You’re seriously going to ride my ass about something so dumb?”

“If it’s dumb then why don’t you quit,” Hermann snapped, huffing and turning forward again.  He heard Newton snort, but after that came silence again.

Hermann was surprised that the man actually listened and did what he’d asked, but he wasn’t going to look a gift horse in the mouth.  He felt himself beginning to relax again, holding his tea close and focusing on the warmth it was giving him. It was no replacement to being wrapped up in a thick, heavy blanket, but bringing one of those into the lab would be going a bit too far, so he made due.

The silence should have been suspicious, but Hermann was enjoying it far too much to question it.  He drank some more tea, smiling softly and even allowing himself the brief indulgence of dozing a bit.  This had been a stressful week, and Hermann rarely let himself take such a break, but he felt like he deserved it.

When the silence was broken again, it was worse than Hermann could have hoped for.  Not only did Newton begin loudly eating chips again, but somehow he’d managed to slink across the lab and lean RIGHT up behind him before doing it.  Hermann sucked in a sharp breath and jumped, coming close to spilling his tea as he jolted upright with wide eyes. Newton broke out into a peal of laughter, and Hermann could only glare.

“Oh my god you should see your face,” Newton laughed gleefully, one hand holding his chip bag and the other curling around his stomach as he only began laughing harder.

“That was not funny,” Hermann glared, trying to calm his furiously beating heart.  Just when he’d truly began to relax, too. It really had been too good to be true.

“No, it was hilarious,” Newton snorted, grinning brightly.  It would be adorable if Hermann wasn’t so angry.

“You’re an ass,” he huffed, turning back around and staring pointedly at the wall of the lab.  Newton didn’t deserve any kind of attention for that; not even Hermann’s irritation.

He listened as Newton’s laughter died down, growing softer before turning into a small wheeze and fading off completely.  Hermann sighed, trying to get comfortable again. It seemed as though his previous relaxation had been permanently interrupted, though.  Well … it was nice while it lasted, he supposed.

There was a bounce next to him after a moment as Newton vaulted himself over the back of the couch and sat down next to him.  His tea sloshed again, and Hermann gripped it tightly in attempts at leveling his mug again before it got dumped on his lap.

“You’re going to make me spill my damn tea,” he snapped harshly, turning to glare even harder at Newton, who was now sitting next to him.  The man had no personal boundaries as he set his chip bag down next to him and wiggled into the cushion, pressing his thigh against Hermann’s and just grinning.

“Nah, never,” he said dismissively, waving a hand casually in the air.  Hermann listened to the way his bracelets jostled against each other with the movement.  Then, he reached over, and before Hermann could say or do anything, Newton was plucking his mug out of his hands and taking a big drink.

“Goddamnit Newton,” Hermann cursed, sneering angrily as he tried to wrestle his drink back.  “What happened to ‘No Hermann, I don’t want any of your hot leaf water’?”

Newton snorted, having the gall to look shocked and mildly offended as Hermann gave a rather spot on (in his opinion) impression of him.

“Well, I didn’t, but now I’m thirsty,” Newton shrugged.

“You should have thought about that when you decided to eat salty chips,” Hermann glared, bringing his mug closer to his chest possessively.  “You always do this, and I’m tired of it.”

“Yeah yeah yeah, you’re fine,” Newton sighed, picking up his back of chips and eating again.  Right next to Hermann. Just as loudly.

So much for relaxing.

Sighing, Hermann stood up as quickly as he could, snatching his cane up and heading back over to his desk.  Behind him, Newton just snorted again and chuckled, crunching away. Sometimes Hermann thought he was going overboard by calling Newton insufferable as often as he did, but then the man went and did things like that, and it only drove the point home even further.

Hermann slammed his mug down on his desk harder than was necessary, glaring at his computer screen as he moved over to his emails and began typing swiftly.  These damn things were more of a formality at this point - Hermann had filed so many and none of them got the attention or response they deserved - but somehow it made him feel better all the same.  He suspected at this point that his emails were getting nothing more than a cursory glance before they were sorted into a file of some kind, and if he wasn’t so exhausted, Hermann might find himself much more irritated at it than thought he was as he typed.   
  


**Marshal’s Office** ****  
**P.P.D.C.  
** **Subject: Formal Complaint**

**Dear Marshal,**

**For what has hardly been the first time, Newton has shown zero respect for personal space.  Against my clear and explicit wishes, he purposely interrupts what brief and much needed breaks I attempt to have here in the lab, and despite the fact that he is perfectly capable of getting refreshments of his own, he continues to steal mine instead.**

**This might perhaps seem like a foolish thing to submit a complaint about, but seeing as how these are always sent to the psychological staff, I felt it important enough to log in the hopes that it can be included in the next conversation one of them has with the man.  I am sure his father did a sufficient job in trying to teach Newton these things as a child, but somehow they have not stuck, and it is causing much more disruption than is necessary in a work environment.**

**Sincerely,**

**Doctor Hermann Gottlieb  
** **PhD**

**Author's Note:**

> Updates planned for every Monday (ideally). If you have any complaint ideas you'd like to see, let me know! There is currently not a set end amount, as this is still technically a WIP. :)


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